Valentine's Day.

Today is Valentine's Day and although I no longer have a boyfriend, I don't look at it as a "made up holiday" or a "Hallmark Holiday". They only say that because they are bitter. I am not bitter than I don't have a boyfriend this year, I am not bitter towards love or happy couples. I have a lot of love in my life and this Valentine's Day that's what I celebrated.

Anyways the real reason for this blog is that yes, it is Valentine's Day, but it is the first Valentine's Day since middle school that I have spent it single. No big deal, it's gotta happen sometime, right? I spent my day spending half of my earnings fom last night at Target, watching some tv, then out to dinner with Corie and Megan. Not what I deep down wanted for this special day of love, but I'll take it.

It has been 3 full weeks since my 2 year relationship with Eric ended. Will someone pinch me? because I have no idea how I am functioning right now. Lies. I know exactly how I am. I have had an amazing support system. My parents regularly checking up on me, my friends sending me random texts like "hey hun, how are you today?" or "How are you dealing today?" It really does help to know that people are concerned for my well-being. They know how much Eric meant...means... to me. They know how truly broken I am right now. And I know how much they love and care about me. To all of my friends, THANK YOU. If it weren't for you guys I think I would still be lying in bed moping. Some days are better than others and I am strong one day but not the next. I lost my best friend, my other half, my boyfriend and my rock in all of this and I have no idea what is going to happen from here. Will we get back together? If so, when? Will I ever trust to love again? Will I ever fall for someone the way I fell for him? There are a lot of unanswered questions right now, but quite frankly, I am sick of unanswered questions.